Monday, August 26, 2013

Things I Don't Like About Being the Mom

 I've always wanted to be a Mom. I've always wanted to have more than the average number of children. When I was in second grade I told my Mom that I was going to have one hundred children. I also told her that I would drive them around in a school bus and live next door to her so she could babysit for me. Most of the time I am thrilled to be a stay at home Mom of many, but there are a few things I don't really like about being a mom. Especially with as many kids as I have.

 I don't like being the only person in the house who can find things. I don't understand why everyone else has such a hard time finding things and I have better things to do with my time than look for things. "Mom, I can't find my shoes" . "Sorry dear, I don't wear your shoes, so I don't know where they are. Have you tried the shoe rack? You know, that special rack I bought just for shoes, right inside the door ". "Mom,where's the flour?" " I don't know. Maybe you should try the canister labeled flour in the cabinet all the baking goods have been in for the entire four years we've lived in this house". DRIVES ME NUTS!!!

 I don't like constantly being interrupted in the bathroom. I've timed it before. I was in the bathroom 3 1/2 minutes and was interrupted FOUR TIMES. Seriously! It only took me 3 1/2 minutes because I was interrupted so much. My husband can be in the bathroom for 30 minutes without being interrupted, but not me. I can't be out of sight for 3 1/2 minutes. It's not like they were coming in to tell me that someone was bleeding or the house was on fire. No, I get asked where the flour is and if they can watch T.V.

 I don't like puke. I won't go into details. I'm sure all parents can fill in the blanks.

 I don't like being the "bad guy". I really don't like to be nagging my kids all the time. I don't bug them about doing what they are supposed to do because I enjoy it. I'd much prefer to have everyone do what they are told the first time. I much rather have my children do the things they need to do without being reminded constantly( note: I am talking about children who are old enough to know better. Obviously the 1 year old NEEDS constant supervision, the 16 year old shouldn't), so we have time to do fun things.

 I don't like combing through everyone's hair with a lice comb multiple times a day now that our possible exposure has turned into a definite exposure. Thank goodness the baby is bald!


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    Many times people don't believe me when I tell them about how much money you can earn taking paid surveys at home...

    So I took a video of myself getting paid $500 for paid surveys.